Sorry you have to deal with this kind of crap. Unfortunately it always happens to the good people and the scum skate away untarnished. Kind of an editorial on life today in general. I know you’re tougher than nails and you’ll drive thru and be back stronger (if that’s even possible with you) and definitely better. You’re definitely one of a kind. I know I’ll miss you here, I love to read your stuff.
Maybe not goodbye with the good, that’s too final. Maybe more like so long (for now).
I always say so long or see ya later because that's what Nanny Shirley always said. Thanks Ken I appreciate you and my friend, please know your hunch about me is spot on. I like to lay low from time to time and really wanted to explain only to my new subscribers. I might lose a little steam, but that's okay. It's worth calling a spade a spade and I call em like I see em.
Love your honesty and fearlessness, Kristin! I believe every bit of the hospital hell you went through/dealt with! I’m sorry you have to beware a bully/stalker… wise if you to step away and put self care first! You are our strong, brave, caring warrior and I wish you safety and peace, sweet friend! I’m so glad to find you here and hope you return when time is right! Much love and admiration for you! ❤️🥰🤗💕
Thank you Joan and back attya! I'm sure I'll lurk, this community is addictive in the best possible way. I'm simply pausing to collect my next words and am no longer in the mood to remain silent. As Charlotte pointed out, it's hard to track replies here on Substack threads so here I am. XOXO.
First of all, Nanny Shirley was in the hospital where Charles Cullen was?!?! Crap! I’m so glad he didn’t kill her. That is terrifying.
Secondly, someone is cyber stalking you?! How dare they. I hope that Substack is helping you block this person. And? If that crummy scared rat is reading this, quit hiding and terrorizing our girl. Stop it right now. If you weren’t smart enough to keep her, that’s all on you. Go elsewhere now.
Thanks Teyani. Yes!! Oh that man is a disgusting man. Last year when the Netflix show about him came out, one of the nurses I used to work with shared her memories of him from school. I haven't reported anything to Substack.
Let's just say it's been online psychological warfare for the last few months here. This man appears and reappears in different forms, under different accounts. Leaves comments that appear supportive, but are actually backhanded insults and references to things we shared or personally discussed. Does this using accounts with names and profile pictures I would never clap back on. Hides behind the faces of women and children. I don't engage with anyone before looking at what they write or share. Then I look a day or two later and the accounts are altered, the post and shares are deleted or they only share my stuff? Hmm. He certainly knows my backstory and knows this nonsense would make me question if I were losing my mind.
I love writing and connecting with readers. So many good things are now coming from sharing my pandemic experience. So I actually hope he's enjoying the ride and watching my account take off. Maybe he'll learn that authenticity is key and that's how I connect with people. He should also think about getting a real job because he clearly has too much time on his hands.
Once more life has reminded me there is always good in goodbye.
Please know that your girl here knows how to take care of herself. I'm just not going to be caught up in this nonsense and will publish more soon. xoxo.
I’ve no doubt you can take care of yourself dear you! Was just feelin’ that Mama Bear kinda love. Maybe just deleting the comments would help you. (?). You’re not crazy. Promise
“This personality shift occurs the moment I don my wooden clogs and set foot inside of the hospital.”
Sometimes it feels like a superpower… to walk into a room and within seconds know which human in the room you need to talk to, what role you need to play, what you need to say and how to say it. It also means leaving that person outside of the room, the one that occasionally gets offended and wants to remind them that they are in a hospice house. The one that wants to sarcastically ask “What do you think we do here?”and “How many people do you think I have managed to control their pain as they are taking their last breaths?”And let’s not forget, we do not give drinks of water to unresponsive patients.
The difference for me is that we have 8 rooms in our house. I exit one door, shower off the sand from my feet, center myself, then open the next door to a world with the same ending but with a different plot, different characters, different stories. I make people laugh, I make people cry, I tell stories, I make fun of family members, I’m sarcastic and fun and at times, fellow nurses get mad when families continually ask if I’m back the next day. I cannot imagine not doing this. How I was given the opportunity to have something this beautiful and to make a living is beyond me.
Josh please publish this and if you already have, please drop a link to it here in the comments section. I am so grateful there are only two rooms for me to enter and my ratio is a strict 2:1 usually only in a union facility. I love to work with the male nurses as much as the female ones, but I refuse to ask the men for a lift or turn, since I know everyone else does. I'd much rather pick your brain about science and death, always love to talk about cars thanks to my father, or thanks to my grandmother Alice. I love the ties that bind all humans together. It's an incredible gift we have isn't it? Not everyone understands, but so many appreciate what we have to give. XOXO.
“I’m partly stepping back for a moment because I strongly suspect I am being cyber stalked and tormented by one of my former boyfriends here on Substack. Again the emphasis is on the word boy. Maybe I am out of my mind, I can’t ever really be sure, but the worst part about feeling this familiar feeling so many years later, is the way in which it isolates me.”
OMG! Today I spent the entire morning at Family Crisis Center seeking help because I believe my ex is harassing me, and following me over to Substack. He slanders me on FB. I’m seeking a restraining order, and the ordeal has been extremely stressful, and the reason I didn’t post my weekly post on Friday. I’m getting back on track this week, but it’s so upsetting. I would love to put out a post about my situation but that terrifies me to talk about it knowing what I write will be seen. I feel safe writing about it here because comments to seven scribers posts aren’t trackable like notes and posts.
I’m sending you love, prayers and very much empathy. Please DM me if you need to seek companionship or just talk. We all boost each other so we can brave out these bullies. Stay safe Kristin ✨💜🙏
Thank you Charlotte. Even when it appears to be harmless I won’t ever ignore it or not take it seriously because of the awful things I’ve seen at work.
I could say a lot more than I have, but I won’t. The simple fact is,
Omg. Kristin! and Charlotte!! 😩 We're traveling in our old van home right now and I just read everything out loud to my John. We send you our love, prayers and if you need anything, a phone chat, just know how much you matter. This cyber bullying crap is so crazy. I'm speaking out a bit more in my writing so I guess I expect something to happen. The closed mindedness, hypnotized 😵💫 world we live in that lives in a foolish little bubble of lies drives me crazy. Kristin you are amazing and I thank you for being one of the warriors who stayed and slayed while receiving certain truths. Sadly, my friend's son, Patrick, walked in. Her best friend, a 30 yr nurse, cried when she found out he went to the e. r. with covid in 2021. So pissed off about the Ivermectin thing. We got some for horses on this trip and some instructions from our equine nurse friend and we witnessed my brother (who felt like a boa was constricting him with killer headache) turn around in a day.
Sending you both big hugs and I'm here always. I pray for this community and specifically for my friends here. May the enemy be bound from both of you. oxox
I love that you read to John while he drives around in a van. It's the most beautiful picture I could imagine and was on the personal vision board I threw into a fire last year. I took a video of it on fire and actually don't care who thinks I'm crazy now that I've met you and so many others here.
Hypnotized is also an accurate description of what it's like to walk through the post pandemic world and interact with those who are so blissfully unaware. I blame no single person or figure, and don't endorse any treatment methods. I will share that I tripled the amount of Zinc I took throughout 2020 and I did this on the advice of an anesthesiologist. I was psychotic with my hand washing and I didn't get Covid until I went to Disney in 2022!! Ha. I am especially sensitive to those who hate hospitals because everyone comes to the hospital, sometimes whether they want to or not. Love to you and yours Deb. XOXO.
Kristin, I can only imagine that you would never endorse anything at this point! For us and our friends it was the absolute taking away the right to try during the pandemic that really got us. I know you get that for sure - but in all the chaos you witnessed it's probably far more complex and best to stay out of it. I'm a huge non-tch CBD user - but I usually tell people it's not for everyone and some brands aren't that good. I strongly believe in Medterra - but it's working for me and I'm different from a lot of people. We are complex and amazing beings. I also use a pep-zin (zinc) daily in a low dose. And a multi that I really like. That's about it.
I bet you are sensitive to people coming to the hospital, much like a pediatric dentist is to a child! No fun. I love your sensitive heart and I, once again, am really sorry that someone is wasting his time on cyber bullying. It really speaks to how broken so many people are and how evil uses them for the worst. I feel a lot of empathy for them. Such a waste of a life that could be so full of other good things. Sending you much love back and when things feel calmer lets plan a date to do the podcast - if and when it feels like the right time. Keep the Armour on. I know you have struggled with God - but definitely let me tell you the vision of sending Him into battle ahead of you is a cool feeling. Let go and let. As Charlotte says, defuse the narcissist with moving forward and not entertaining them. Belief in that power is a way for the Divine to work it's magic. Now that's a vision that I know you have down. We really have no control over much except for how we handle things. oxox
I worked in the Scottish health service for around 26 years. Trained both in general and psychiatric nursing. I ended up as a rehab. You write so well about what the job is. I had friends who never intended to the work and ended up right up to there necks on it Co opted in to help during the first years of the pandemic. Living with, dealing with, the whole shitshow. I admire them and you so much.
Thank you and so lovely to meet you! I can't say I've spoken with someone from the Scottish health service. I used to pick up hours in a state locked psychiatric unit and it was always an eye opener. Thank you for your support and I send my admiration back to you.
So pleased to have met you in this space Kristin. Get out there, hit the tarmac and enjoy the freedom ... travel safe and go well. Hope that great mother nature of ours gives you all nurturing you have provided for others. Look forward to reading about your adventures when you see fit to post. 💜
Through my wife's Alzheimer's condition, we have met several nurses who have drastically improved my impression of the nursing profession. I think I can safely add you to that list.
Your story is remarkable. Your personality is electrifying. Your writing is exceptional.
I don't know how your profile got boosted to me, but I thank whoever is in charge for making it happen.
Looking forward to finding you again after your break.
Thank you Larry. I don't believe in accidents, so I am glad you found your way to my profile. Your comment warmed my heart, they all do and this is what keeps me going when I lose focus on my goal. I always hope to bring people together because I know how lonely I feel sometimes. I know how lonely my patients and their families feel, especially when they face a health illness, crisis or devastating diagnosis. .
I send my best wishes to you and your wife. I doubt I'll be gone for too long. There is simply too much work to be done, but in the meantime it's great to hear you've found some nurses who have improved your impression of us. I am honored to be one of them.
Well fuck, I’m all but at a loss for words. I’m so sorry you or anyone else had to deal with the chaos-induced stress of being a caregiver during COVID. One of my best friends took his own life in the middle of things. He worked as a CO in a prison. Also, there has been an increase in suicide among pastors during and after the lockdown.
My wife has sickle cell anemia, and I spent the pandemic terrified she would have a crisis and need to be hospitalized. It just didn’t seem like it would go well. Thank the Lord it didn’t happen.
Thanks for all you do, and thanks for this reminder to be fuckin kind.
You’re welcome, I’ll take it. My sister’s partner is a long time CO and they happened to have a baby in August of 2020. I always see myself in so many readers and remember how human we all are.
Sickle cell anemia is a tough one, it pains me to hear this and I hope your wife is doing well.
Chaos induced stress is so accurate.i don’t even call it the pandemic anymore, usually just call it 2020. Thanks for sharing Gene. I truly appreciate it.
Thanks for your honesty and fearlessness and for looking out for patients, especially when no one else is. When my husband was taking his dying breaths in the ICU, it was a nurse who sat by my side and waited with me, one who came from another floor and had someone cover for her, just to be with us. I will never forget her. When I was in labor for 34 hours, it was a nurse who ministered to me like an angel and got me through the worst of the pain—my husband had to take a break. Your job is only for the angels, although sometimes you have to be the devil to get the job done. God bless you and give you the strength to fight the good fight!
Thank you and I hope God blesses you too Carole. I certainly feel blessed to be here! I am happy I get to share my experience with the world of Substack.
I’m happy to hear the nurse was there for you and I feel their kindness in my heart. It’s a small thing and many never remember our names, but this is so irrelevant.
I always offer to stay and respect the wishes of the loved ones. It’s about 50-50.
Sorry you have to deal with this kind of crap. Unfortunately it always happens to the good people and the scum skate away untarnished. Kind of an editorial on life today in general. I know you’re tougher than nails and you’ll drive thru and be back stronger (if that’s even possible with you) and definitely better. You’re definitely one of a kind. I know I’ll miss you here, I love to read your stuff.
Maybe not goodbye with the good, that’s too final. Maybe more like so long (for now).
I always say so long or see ya later because that's what Nanny Shirley always said. Thanks Ken I appreciate you and my friend, please know your hunch about me is spot on. I like to lay low from time to time and really wanted to explain only to my new subscribers. I might lose a little steam, but that's okay. It's worth calling a spade a spade and I call em like I see em.
Love your honesty and fearlessness, Kristin! I believe every bit of the hospital hell you went through/dealt with! I’m sorry you have to beware a bully/stalker… wise if you to step away and put self care first! You are our strong, brave, caring warrior and I wish you safety and peace, sweet friend! I’m so glad to find you here and hope you return when time is right! Much love and admiration for you! ❤️🥰🤗💕
Thank you Joan and back attya! I'm sure I'll lurk, this community is addictive in the best possible way. I'm simply pausing to collect my next words and am no longer in the mood to remain silent. As Charlotte pointed out, it's hard to track replies here on Substack threads so here I am. XOXO.
O.M.G. To so much of this.
First of all, Nanny Shirley was in the hospital where Charles Cullen was?!?! Crap! I’m so glad he didn’t kill her. That is terrifying.
Secondly, someone is cyber stalking you?! How dare they. I hope that Substack is helping you block this person. And? If that crummy scared rat is reading this, quit hiding and terrorizing our girl. Stop it right now. If you weren’t smart enough to keep her, that’s all on you. Go elsewhere now.
Many hugs in your hiatus Kristin.
Thanks Teyani. Yes!! Oh that man is a disgusting man. Last year when the Netflix show about him came out, one of the nurses I used to work with shared her memories of him from school. I haven't reported anything to Substack.
Let's just say it's been online psychological warfare for the last few months here. This man appears and reappears in different forms, under different accounts. Leaves comments that appear supportive, but are actually backhanded insults and references to things we shared or personally discussed. Does this using accounts with names and profile pictures I would never clap back on. Hides behind the faces of women and children. I don't engage with anyone before looking at what they write or share. Then I look a day or two later and the accounts are altered, the post and shares are deleted or they only share my stuff? Hmm. He certainly knows my backstory and knows this nonsense would make me question if I were losing my mind.
I love writing and connecting with readers. So many good things are now coming from sharing my pandemic experience. So I actually hope he's enjoying the ride and watching my account take off. Maybe he'll learn that authenticity is key and that's how I connect with people. He should also think about getting a real job because he clearly has too much time on his hands.
Once more life has reminded me there is always good in goodbye.
Please know that your girl here knows how to take care of herself. I'm just not going to be caught up in this nonsense and will publish more soon. xoxo.
I’ve no doubt you can take care of yourself dear you! Was just feelin’ that Mama Bear kinda love. Maybe just deleting the comments would help you. (?). You’re not crazy. Promise
“This personality shift occurs the moment I don my wooden clogs and set foot inside of the hospital.”
Sometimes it feels like a superpower… to walk into a room and within seconds know which human in the room you need to talk to, what role you need to play, what you need to say and how to say it. It also means leaving that person outside of the room, the one that occasionally gets offended and wants to remind them that they are in a hospice house. The one that wants to sarcastically ask “What do you think we do here?”and “How many people do you think I have managed to control their pain as they are taking their last breaths?”And let’s not forget, we do not give drinks of water to unresponsive patients.
The difference for me is that we have 8 rooms in our house. I exit one door, shower off the sand from my feet, center myself, then open the next door to a world with the same ending but with a different plot, different characters, different stories. I make people laugh, I make people cry, I tell stories, I make fun of family members, I’m sarcastic and fun and at times, fellow nurses get mad when families continually ask if I’m back the next day. I cannot imagine not doing this. How I was given the opportunity to have something this beautiful and to make a living is beyond me.
Josh please publish this and if you already have, please drop a link to it here in the comments section. I am so grateful there are only two rooms for me to enter and my ratio is a strict 2:1 usually only in a union facility. I love to work with the male nurses as much as the female ones, but I refuse to ask the men for a lift or turn, since I know everyone else does. I'd much rather pick your brain about science and death, always love to talk about cars thanks to my father, or thanks to my grandmother Alice. I love the ties that bind all humans together. It's an incredible gift we have isn't it? Not everyone understands, but so many appreciate what we have to give. XOXO.
“I’m partly stepping back for a moment because I strongly suspect I am being cyber stalked and tormented by one of my former boyfriends here on Substack. Again the emphasis is on the word boy. Maybe I am out of my mind, I can’t ever really be sure, but the worst part about feeling this familiar feeling so many years later, is the way in which it isolates me.”
OMG! Today I spent the entire morning at Family Crisis Center seeking help because I believe my ex is harassing me, and following me over to Substack. He slanders me on FB. I’m seeking a restraining order, and the ordeal has been extremely stressful, and the reason I didn’t post my weekly post on Friday. I’m getting back on track this week, but it’s so upsetting. I would love to put out a post about my situation but that terrifies me to talk about it knowing what I write will be seen. I feel safe writing about it here because comments to seven scribers posts aren’t trackable like notes and posts.
I’m sending you love, prayers and very much empathy. Please DM me if you need to seek companionship or just talk. We all boost each other so we can brave out these bullies. Stay safe Kristin ✨💜🙏
Thank you Charlotte. Even when it appears to be harmless I won’t ever ignore it or not take it seriously because of the awful things I’ve seen at work.
I could say a lot more than I have, but I won’t. The simple fact is,
I will always find the good in goodbye.
Stay safe my friend.
Omg. Kristin! and Charlotte!! 😩 We're traveling in our old van home right now and I just read everything out loud to my John. We send you our love, prayers and if you need anything, a phone chat, just know how much you matter. This cyber bullying crap is so crazy. I'm speaking out a bit more in my writing so I guess I expect something to happen. The closed mindedness, hypnotized 😵💫 world we live in that lives in a foolish little bubble of lies drives me crazy. Kristin you are amazing and I thank you for being one of the warriors who stayed and slayed while receiving certain truths. Sadly, my friend's son, Patrick, walked in. Her best friend, a 30 yr nurse, cried when she found out he went to the e. r. with covid in 2021. So pissed off about the Ivermectin thing. We got some for horses on this trip and some instructions from our equine nurse friend and we witnessed my brother (who felt like a boa was constricting him with killer headache) turn around in a day.
Sending you both big hugs and I'm here always. I pray for this community and specifically for my friends here. May the enemy be bound from both of you. oxox
I love that you read to John while he drives around in a van. It's the most beautiful picture I could imagine and was on the personal vision board I threw into a fire last year. I took a video of it on fire and actually don't care who thinks I'm crazy now that I've met you and so many others here.
Hypnotized is also an accurate description of what it's like to walk through the post pandemic world and interact with those who are so blissfully unaware. I blame no single person or figure, and don't endorse any treatment methods. I will share that I tripled the amount of Zinc I took throughout 2020 and I did this on the advice of an anesthesiologist. I was psychotic with my hand washing and I didn't get Covid until I went to Disney in 2022!! Ha. I am especially sensitive to those who hate hospitals because everyone comes to the hospital, sometimes whether they want to or not. Love to you and yours Deb. XOXO.
Kristin, I can only imagine that you would never endorse anything at this point! For us and our friends it was the absolute taking away the right to try during the pandemic that really got us. I know you get that for sure - but in all the chaos you witnessed it's probably far more complex and best to stay out of it. I'm a huge non-tch CBD user - but I usually tell people it's not for everyone and some brands aren't that good. I strongly believe in Medterra - but it's working for me and I'm different from a lot of people. We are complex and amazing beings. I also use a pep-zin (zinc) daily in a low dose. And a multi that I really like. That's about it.
I bet you are sensitive to people coming to the hospital, much like a pediatric dentist is to a child! No fun. I love your sensitive heart and I, once again, am really sorry that someone is wasting his time on cyber bullying. It really speaks to how broken so many people are and how evil uses them for the worst. I feel a lot of empathy for them. Such a waste of a life that could be so full of other good things. Sending you much love back and when things feel calmer lets plan a date to do the podcast - if and when it feels like the right time. Keep the Armour on. I know you have struggled with God - but definitely let me tell you the vision of sending Him into battle ahead of you is a cool feeling. Let go and let. As Charlotte says, defuse the narcissist with moving forward and not entertaining them. Belief in that power is a way for the Divine to work it's magic. Now that's a vision that I know you have down. We really have no control over much except for how we handle things. oxox
hell yeah! your strength and audacity is infectious. in a great way. all the best to you on your hiatus 🫡
Thank you and I absolutely took that as a compliment. The language of love is universal and if you know you know. XOXO
I worked in the Scottish health service for around 26 years. Trained both in general and psychiatric nursing. I ended up as a rehab. You write so well about what the job is. I had friends who never intended to the work and ended up right up to there necks on it Co opted in to help during the first years of the pandemic. Living with, dealing with, the whole shitshow. I admire them and you so much.
Thank you and so lovely to meet you! I can't say I've spoken with someone from the Scottish health service. I used to pick up hours in a state locked psychiatric unit and it was always an eye opener. Thank you for your support and I send my admiration back to you.
So pleased to have met you in this space Kristin. Get out there, hit the tarmac and enjoy the freedom ... travel safe and go well. Hope that great mother nature of ours gives you all nurturing you have provided for others. Look forward to reading about your adventures when you see fit to post. 💜
Through my wife's Alzheimer's condition, we have met several nurses who have drastically improved my impression of the nursing profession. I think I can safely add you to that list.
Your story is remarkable. Your personality is electrifying. Your writing is exceptional.
I don't know how your profile got boosted to me, but I thank whoever is in charge for making it happen.
Looking forward to finding you again after your break.
Thank you Larry. I don't believe in accidents, so I am glad you found your way to my profile. Your comment warmed my heart, they all do and this is what keeps me going when I lose focus on my goal. I always hope to bring people together because I know how lonely I feel sometimes. I know how lonely my patients and their families feel, especially when they face a health illness, crisis or devastating diagnosis. .
I send my best wishes to you and your wife. I doubt I'll be gone for too long. There is simply too much work to be done, but in the meantime it's great to hear you've found some nurses who have improved your impression of us. I am honored to be one of them.
I shared your article with the two nurses that I respect and cherish the most. I hope they find a kindred spirit in you and your work.
Thank you again. I hope they like it! By the way Nanny Shirley was from Frackville PA and I spent a few
summers in Mount Union with her. She died when I was 22 and she is the primary reason I write this publication 25 year later.
That's interesting. I'm always fascinated by the factors that trigger a life of service (and truly dedicated service) in good people.
Condolences and congratulations in turning grief into something exceptionally wonderful.
Take good care, Kristin. Hope to see you back here soon with more compelling stories.
Excellent work great job
Well fuck, I’m all but at a loss for words. I’m so sorry you or anyone else had to deal with the chaos-induced stress of being a caregiver during COVID. One of my best friends took his own life in the middle of things. He worked as a CO in a prison. Also, there has been an increase in suicide among pastors during and after the lockdown.
My wife has sickle cell anemia, and I spent the pandemic terrified she would have a crisis and need to be hospitalized. It just didn’t seem like it would go well. Thank the Lord it didn’t happen.
Thanks for all you do, and thanks for this reminder to be fuckin kind.
You’re welcome, I’ll take it. My sister’s partner is a long time CO and they happened to have a baby in August of 2020. I always see myself in so many readers and remember how human we all are.
Sickle cell anemia is a tough one, it pains me to hear this and I hope your wife is doing well.
Chaos induced stress is so accurate.i don’t even call it the pandemic anymore, usually just call it 2020. Thanks for sharing Gene. I truly appreciate it.
Thanks for your honesty and fearlessness and for looking out for patients, especially when no one else is. When my husband was taking his dying breaths in the ICU, it was a nurse who sat by my side and waited with me, one who came from another floor and had someone cover for her, just to be with us. I will never forget her. When I was in labor for 34 hours, it was a nurse who ministered to me like an angel and got me through the worst of the pain—my husband had to take a break. Your job is only for the angels, although sometimes you have to be the devil to get the job done. God bless you and give you the strength to fight the good fight!
Thank you and I hope God blesses you too Carole. I certainly feel blessed to be here! I am happy I get to share my experience with the world of Substack.
I’m happy to hear the nurse was there for you and I feel their kindness in my heart. It’s a small thing and many never remember our names, but this is so irrelevant.
I always offer to stay and respect the wishes of the loved ones. It’s about 50-50.